Cabinet of Curiosities Show 24 – Planes, Trains and Automobiles

Image: War Time Summer by Kevin Walsh

“I like trains. I like their rhythm,
and I like the freedom of being suspended between two places,
all anxieties of purpose taken care of:
for this moment I know where I am going.”
Anna Funder, Stasiland: Stories from Behind the Berlin Wall

All forms of transportation are here –

All you need to do is sit back, relax and let us transport you in style to your destination

Ladies and Gentlemen, if we could just have your attention for a few safety announcements.

Please keep your hands and feet inside the vehicle at all times.  We would also advise that you keep your head in the vehicle – if you like it where it is

Please ensure you have a valid ticket.

Passengers found not to be in possession of a valid ticket will be moved to a carriage filled with a hen party on their way back from a day out drinking (you may wish to bring an umbrella), 5 shouty teenagers who want to play techno on their tinny phone (you may wish to bring earplugs), a hyperactive toddler with a militant parent who believes their little darling should be allowed to do whatever they want (you may wish to bring a baseball bat – for the parent)………and several copies of the Daily Mail.

Actually we’re just kidding about the Daily Mail.  We’re not THAT evil.

In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, nothing will happen, because we’re not in a plane, but do feel free to cup your hand over your nose and make Darth Vader breathy noises – we have a long way to go…….

Cabinet appreciates that you have a choice for all your transport needs

and would like to thank you for choosing Curiosity Coaches

 

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